memorial day slump.

So I think this is about the most depressed i've felt this whole year. I was doing really good, merging my winnings with my losses. But somehow I feel I hit a wall. We played topanga days festival, and I just felt so blah there for some reason. A hot day, wearing suits, kind of an odd venue for us. Than later on a party that I probably would have been better off skipping. Not that it was terrible, but I ate junkfood, drank, met a lot of people but if felt so random, like I could have been doing something better. And feeling let down by certain people, not being able to tell if they're on my team or not is quite a difficulty. Feeling used and abused and a million miles away from my dreams. Also, feeling like i lost touch with certain people recently and feeling bad about that. I have this feeling i could transcend some of this with excercise but I don't even feel like transcending any more.

some ideas

bumper sticker: ever get the feeling you've been neoconned?


Pic. of middle finger: buy one, get one free

hanging out at dolce

I saw Kori Withers play. She's a great singer/ songwriter. I like her vibe, she seems like a friendly young woman. Her dad is Bill Withers. She was in my music biz class at ucla and I got one of her mass emailings and added her on myspace. I've been meaning to go see her play. I'm sure she wasn't crazy about the offensive standup comedians going on before her at obriens. I don't really like how they lump these two genres together that are like oil and water. I mean it's ok when there's comedians before the band I'm in, Jaime Sol Black, because our music is testosterone fueled rock and roll. But it doesn't belong with soul sistah infused blues folk rock.

hanging out at dolce

I saw Kori Withers play. She's a great singer/ songwriter. I like her vibe, she seems like a friendly young woman. Her dad is Bill Withers. She was in my music biz class at ucla and I got one of her mass emailings and added her on myspace. I've been meaning to go see her play. I'm sure she wasn't crazy about the offensive standup comedians going on before her at obriens. I don't really like how they lump these two genres together that are like oil and water. I mean it's ok when there's comedians before the band I'm in, Jaime Sol Black, because our music is testosterone fueled rock and roll. But it doesn't belong with soul sistah infused blues folk rock.

books to read

art of plain talk r. flesch
art of readable writing r. flesch
competitive strategy m. porter
die broke by s pllan and m levine
dress gray L truscott 4
elements of style s and w
enough by j schwartz
finding a winning edge b walsh
for better or for worse divorce reconsindered m. hetherington
fraud how to protect your self from schemes, scams, m. bertrand
guerilla marketing by j. c. levinson
how i turned 1000 into 1000000 in r estate in my spare timew.nicerson
how to make a fortune today w nickerson
win friends d carnegie
influence, science and practice by john allen paulos
landlording by leigh robinson
little league confi. b. geist
making the most of your money by j bryant quinn
millionaire mind
m next door
moneyball m lewis
moral mazes by r jackall
a new guide to bet. writin flesch and lass
new new thing m lewis
new rational manager by kepner and tregoe
passages by gail sheehy
peter principle by dr. l j. peter, raymond hull
p of p thinking j v peale
productive edge richard lester
s assessment and c development by john kotter
stolen valore rg burkett and g whitley
technique of clear writing r gunning
theory of the leisure class t. veblen
t and g rich n hill
vince lmbardi on football v.l.
unexpected legacy of divorce by judith wallenstein
when the game stands tall by neil hayes
whistleblowers, broken lives, and organizational power by c.f.alford
whistleblowers survival guide by gov. account project
why smart pe make big money mistakes belsky and gilovich
wimpy parents by kenneth condrell
winner take all society robert frank and phillip cook

working stiff

strange daze at starbucks

so howard schultz, the CEO and owner of starbucks came in today. I swear to god, my life plays out like Forrest Gump sometimes. Here I am working here for not even 2 weeks and I'm there with Howard mofo schultz. I didn't talk to him, but I held the door opened for him when he left. I wanted to ask him why the hell I have to stock the condiment bar with sugar subsititutes like extra and nutrasweet which have cancer causing aspartame in them. He seemed like a pleasant enough guy. One of the district managers advised me not to wheel the trash cans by him. 'That's Howard,' he says, 'I would just go hang out a while.' So I took the trash cans to the back and left them by the dumpster and went back intot the store.
Earlier in the day, there had been a Homeless man who I spoke with last week. He had applied for a job here. Now he was in a shouting match with our manager. "Big Brother!" She said to me. That meant she means backup. "You're no longer welcome in the store," she said to him. "I don't want to come into this peace of shit anyways, it's straight out of 1984, you goddamn slave driver!" He shouted. It was very strange because he had been telling me that he thought he could really do a good job. It's strange that he made the 1984 analogy, because I had been thinking that starbucks keeps their employees satisfied through the caffeine. It is quite orwellian, but a lot of the people that work there are cool.
I was wondering if there's some kind of happy medium between one of these people who rails against the system and those who buy into it.

song for joe herrold 73-07

song for joe

9.27.07

sometimes it his me:

you're not wih us any more

visions streaming memories

of what we had before

& I forget yet

something takes me back

to U again: